Who is God? Where did we all come from? Why are we here? What is our destiny? Is our world the creation of some divine being or merely the result of a series of events that science can explain? Is there life after death? Is reincarnation real?
Mankind has pondered these questions for centuries and never found a satisfying answer. Likewise, as individuals, we tend to ask ourselves these same questions at some point during our lives. We then attempt to solve them based on our understanding of the world and of religion. But what is understanding? What does it really mean to understand? Is our understanding made from personal opinions based on our overall experience in this world? Or do we form our understanding from what we know to be true based on scientific facts that are undeniable and can be proven?
Ever since I can remember, I have loved to learn. I have always felt the need to explore things that I didn't understand because, as a person with anxiety, understanding brings me a sense of comfort. The more I know about myself and my environment, the less anxious I feel. After all, there are few things that are more worrying and scary than the unknown. If something doesn’t make sense to me, I feel compelled to find an explanation in order to put my mind at rest. Once I have an answer that makes sense, I can seek out other, more complicated questions and try to make sense of those too. It is a good coping mechanism for me. It also helps to keep my mind distracted from the excessive worry that I have struggled with since I was a child.
Then one day, I decided to ask myself two of the most complicated questions one could ask. It is an inquiry that people have attempted to answer throughout the entire history of civilization. The mystery that surrounds it is as intriguing as it is controversial. These questions were: What is the origin of the universe, and who is God? Up until recently, I wouldn’t say I knew God, because He was just a name and a possible explanation to me. I've always felt like there was something “bigger than us,” but I couldn’t prove it or explain it in a scientific manner. I just couldn't see our world coming into existence from nothing. To me, a God or Divine Creator was much more plausible, even though there was little evidence to support this.
Like Steven Hawking, who worked the majority of his life trying to explain the origin of the universe, I was seeking an answer. I could see why Hawking concluded that “God was not necessary to create the universe,” just as much as I concluded the opposite. The problem was that both theories had huge flaws, and one could argue that there were proven facts supporting both. Could it be that the facts themselves are wrong? Could it be that what we take to be absolute truth, be merely an illusion?
Well, consider this: Everything you see actually enters your eyes upside down. Your brain reverses the images back the right way, allowing us to see the way things really are. Also, everyone has a small blind spot in each eye, that’s no bigger than a pen head. There is actually a tiny section in the eyes that cannot see anything. However, your brain uses the image surrounding the parts of your eyes that you can see through and mimics it, filling in this spot according to what the eye is likely to see. The eye does such an excellent job of doing this, that you would never think that part of what you see in everyday life is not actually there. So, seeing may be believing in these cases, but it doesn’t define fact. Our reality is changing—therefore, so is our definition of truth. So how can we know if there is a God, if the premise on which we base God is constantly changing? The answer for me was easy. If I was to find any absolute truth, I had to disregard everything I believed to be fact and ask God Himself. I considered everything I knew at that time as one piece to a large puzzle. All facts became nothing more than potential truths. If there was a God, I wanted to know who He was and I wanted to hear it from Him.
On October 6, 2015, that’s exactly what happened. The following book is about my experience with the Divine in a reality called “The Absolute.” During this incident, my consciousness was at one with God’s, and I was taken to a world of undeniable perfection. The experience seemed very brief. Since time does not exist in The Absolute or Heaven, I can only make a guess as to how long I felt I was with God, and that guess would be under ten minutes. But when I separated from God’s consciousness and came back to this reality, I realized that the experience was just shy of three days long. During this time, I have no recollection of what was going on in my physical body or anything else pertaining to this reality. It was as if I had dozed off and returned to consciousness almost three days later.
In this book, I will share my experience to the best of my ability, including everything that God revealed to me. I was given insight into issues of the utmost importance. These topics were about people, the Earth, levels of consciousness, Heaven and the laws that God set forth to govern Earth. The Divine shared His views on death, tragedy, and evil. He also explained how our actions shape the collective conscious and subsequently determine the future of our world. Most of all, He emphasized how endless and unconditional his love is for each and every one of us.
I will often refer to God as a male figure by using the terms “He” and “Him,” although this isn’t correct. God isn’t limited to one gender or anything else for that matter. I only do this to put God into a familiar and relatable context that is relevant to this reality with respect to the various religions exercised in society.
Before you read this book, I must tell you one thing that is of tremendous importance to me. God made it clear that He would not interfere with free will unless given permission by those who seek Him. Although He didn't specifically tell me not to, I feel I must not interfere with your free will either.
Therefore, my objective is not to persuade or deter you to believe in God or change your beliefs. You, and only you, can make that choice. If you obtain anything at all from this book, let it be that God is unconditional love. My mission is to provide you with information so that you may seek God and make the best possible choices in your life. It doesn't matter if you are agnostic, a believer, or an atheist; I encourage you to set aside what you hold to be true and experience something different. I hope that you read this book with an open mind devoid of prior convictions.
Chapter One – How it Began
October 6, 2015, started off like any other autumn day. I woke up in the same, small empty apartment that I had lived in for over three years. I really despised this place but due to a tornado in 2011 that nearly demolished the only place I considered home, I was forced to move out. I was certainly not proud of this diminutive dwelling in any way. In fact, this suffocating, claustrophobic place was one of the many things in my life that was getting to me and grinding me down on a daily basis. It was like having my own personal jail cell, both in its restrictive size and the fact that I couldn’t seem to escape from it. As I lay in bed with the curtains still drawn, dread quickly consumed me as I thought about facing the day.
Over the past few years, I had felt as if I was living my life in vain and most of the days were quite pointless to me. Whatever I did, it appeared to have no real significance in my life and the outcome was always the same. It’s not like I was lacking in ambition or dreams, far from it, in fact. However, every time I tried to pursue them, more and more obstacles got in my way. This created an overwhelming sense of frustration and hopelessness in me.
After an hour or so of procrastination, I finally mustered up the energy to get out of bed and get ready for the day. As I went for my morning walk, I looked across at the playground that lay between the cold and forbidding apartment complexes that made up my neighborhood. I could see some of the local children playing and soaking up the last few decent days of warm weather. The winters in this part of the region are harsh and soon the frigid temperatures would begin gradually creeping in. The last remnants of summer lingered on at this point though, so I stopped for a moment to observe them. Their innocence and utter joy intrigued me. The only things they had to worry about were making it home before dark and whether to play tag or tug of war. I tried to imagine myself in this “childlike” ecstasy, but I just couldn’t do it.
You see, while they were playing pretend, I was facing a different type of war; one that was all too real. Since moving into my own place, I had pondered upon my life many times, trying to figure out which direction it was going. Despite years of reflection and numerous attempts at trying to establish some defined path, I couldn’t seem to get any traction, so to speak. I came to the realization that I didn’t actually have a direction. I didn't know who I was, what I wanted to be, or my purpose on Earth. After years of soul searching, it dawned on me that I had been wandering aimlessly and my life was going around in circles.
I felt desperate and knew I had to change something. The problem was, I didn't know what to change, how to change it, or even if it was within my ability to do so. I was exhausted from trying to provide a rational solution to this dilemma and it was something that plagued me day after day. I couldn’t believe how hard it was to find an answer to something that affected my life on such a massive scale.
I quickly moved on from the playground area and got on with my daily routine. My day continued to be a regular, normal day until around six o’clock in the evening, when I decided to take a nap. As I was lying in bed, the depression and frustration started building up inside me. With nothing else to occupy my mind in the quiet of the room, I found myself asking the same old questions that had circulated inside my head for the past decade. Yet again, I failed to find the answers I so vigorously sought. I have always been a good problem-solver, but this one had me completely baffled. I didn’t even remotely know what to do next in regard to changing my life.
It was then that I decided to ask God (if He existed) for help. This was not unusual for me; I had asked God for help many times in the past, but most of my prayers went unanswered. I would just have that usual, one-sided conversation that most people are very familiar with when it comes to praying. I was used to the silence that followed my questions or requests and had grown accustomed to feeling ignored. So although I was hoping for an answer, I in no way anticipated one.
Over the past three years, I had begun to doubt everything that I had been taught to believe in. This was basically because none of it was working in my life. I was beyond frustrated, not with just myself but the world in general. I had always been a very caring person and often helped others before myself, yet where was my reward and why had my life not changed? Old sayings like “hard work pays off” seemed to be nothing more than comforting words that didn’t necessarily hold any truth, or at least not in my case. I honestly didn’t know what to believe anymore, especially when it came to God. If there was any truth to anything, or a standard to live by, I needed someone to let me know. Therefore, I decided to start from scratch; I set aside everything I thought to be true and cleared all of my beliefs from my mind. I did this because I wanted to know the real truth, not what my parents, my church, or my teachers had decided to tell me. I was in a lot of mental anguish and if I was to keep going, I needed a miracle fast. As soon as I cleared my mind and opened my heart with sincerity, I started to pray.
“God,” I said, “I’ve tried everything I can think of to give my life some meaning and purpose, but nothing seems to change. I still have yet to find any real happiness or peace in my endeavor. If you’re up there, please let me know what I’m doing wrong and show me the way. At the very least, point me in the right direction.”
It was then that I felt it—an overwhelming sense of peace. A peace unlike anything I have ever felt before. All fear, worry, and doubt dissolved from my mind and it was only that moment that had any importance. It was as if the world completely vanished from my senses. I was no longer aware of this reality or any of the problems associated with it. As peace penetrated my soul, time seemed to stand still, and everything fell silent. This was not the same kind of silence that you would experience in life. This was true silence, both mentally and physically, without any distant noises or distractions. It was complete peace. I knew I was experiencing something very unique but I didn't quite know what it was.
Just as I was trying to figure it out and get used to these new surroundings, the silence was broken by a voice.
There is normally nothing too unusual about someone saying your name, but this was completely different. This wasn’t auditory. This voice appeared in my head, as though it had gently drifted telepathically into my thoughts. This intrusion should have alarmed me, perhaps even scared me, but instead I felt great comfort at its arrival and welcomed it there.
The first thing I noticed was that I was being addressed by my full name:—Joshua. Yes, my name is Joshua, but nobody calls me that. I have always been known as just Josh. In fact, the few people that I have a close relationship with choose to call me by some unfortunate nicknames: my mother calls me Jez and my brothers call me Erma. Many of my high school friends also address me by various nicknames. I have only been called Joshua a handful of times throughout my life and usually by people of authority, like teachers calling roll on the first day of school or a doctor formally addressing me for the first time. In other words, anyone who knows me well, knows that I prefer to be called Josh and not Joshua. It was at that point that I began to realize that this was not my imagination. After all, why would my imagination address me by a name I have only heard a couple dozen times?
This soft and beautiful voice had the characteristics of both male and female in terms of its tone, but again, it was not auditory. The voice blended perfectly and harmoniously, creating an elegant dynamic that was truly a pleasure to experience. I somehow knew that this had to be the voice of God. It was too serene to belong to any normal person.
I waited in the silence, hoping that the voice would speak again and say something more than my name this time. While I waited, I noticed just how dark this place was—I couldn’t see anything. If I would have put my hand in front of my face, it would still have been engulfed by the blackness that surrounded my consciousness. Why would God live in such a dark environment? I didn’t know, but I was determined to find out.
As I began exploring and familiarizing myself with this new reality, I discovered that this blackened void was not as empty as I had first thought. Something was constantly there. I couldn’t see or hear it, but I could feel it all around me. In a normal situation, being in the pitch black with an unknown person or entity would be terrifying to anyone. However, I was not frightened. I felt nothing but overwhelming warmth, peace, and love. I could sense that what I was feeling was God’s consciousness. It felt separate from mine, yet paradoxically, I felt it radiating through every fiber of my being. I knew it was intrinsically linked to my own consciousness in some way, although I was yet to fully understand how.
Also, although my surroundings were completely black at first, I soon realized that I could be anywhere or see anything by simply thinking about it. Since I did not think of any particular thing or place when I initially entered this reality, it made sense that my surroundings would reflect that by being dark. Darkness is, after all, associated with nothingness. Shortly after being in the darkness though, I thought of light. With that thought, I instantly saw the brightest, warmest, and most loving light imaginable. This was without a doubt the Eternal Light of God and it was dispersed endlessly throughout Heaven. The ability to do anything or be anywhere was a very liberating sensation.
Once I realized I was in the presence of God, I decided to speak. This is when my conversation with the Divine really began.